Sunday 22 June 2014

My Core

I do not want to feign being brave, but to truly be assured that I believe in You.
For there is but one God, one love that spreads beyond my most stretched imaginations, and oh what a great wonder it is that that love is directed to me! For Yahweh is my provider, the stronghold of my sanctuary; Jesus is my salvation, the key and bond to the heart of my Father; the Holy Spirit my weapon, my compass. My sin is like stones that are chained to me in the middle of an ocean. Yet I float, for Jesus first sank for me and then lifted me out of the waters. The Lord my God both witnessed and agonised over my sin. His compassion deeper than the reaches of hell has purified me to the point of confident statement - that I am alike with Christ.

Now I stand against the world; for it is no longer where I belong but my home is in heaven, where one day I will rejoice in the presence of my one true love: the person who first loved me when I was undeserving of love; the person who first entered me, to rearrange the pieces of a broken heart and make me whole; the spirit that resides in me, the source of my authority in this temporary world where the limitations of my flesh are broken by the insurmountable power of an everlasting God. I walk with promises that I will never be walking alone. My feet step through fires and still I will never be set ablaze. For my God guards me. When He bursts out of the gates, I am carried by His wind. Always running, but never weary, pulled down by the weight of the world, but soaring without wings. I am kept by my God to the point where death is no longer a fear, rather it is something I desire; that I may resurrect with the holiness passed on to me through the sacrifice of my Saviour. 

Now I am here, death is only something I will accept when it is blessed to me. I pray that I am breathing the will of my Father that it too is a part of me and becomes the very core of my being. For to live is Christ and to die is gain. I wish to possess humility to understand that I am priceless to Him and yet I must lay my life down beneath all else like Jesus did for me. I ask that the heart that He has for others, I will have too. I am a first-hand recipient of a grace that I could have never earned, my abhorred transgressions forgotten. So now it is no longer sympathy that I feel for others, but empathy in the mutual unworthiness and pain that we all experience. It is no longer pity but encouragement to know that pain is only for yesterday. For today is a blessing, a triumph over my yesterday, a victory over my past and an entirely new future already conquered and overcome by my Lord Jesus. His will is mine, and by no means will I sin so that grace will increase, but I press on towards the goal of living the life of someone who is redeemed and not guilty. I am but a child knowing nothing, only the wisdom that comes from God. I am a child who is forgiven and loved.

So I know, that I will soon be greeted with wide-open arms. There is no trace of regret for me but only a fulfilment incomprehensible and unattainable by mere men. The injustice of a few leads us all to seek justice, and the one sacrifice of God has called for us all to realise the treasure that has been stored for us, and how easy it is to receive it! Only believe. Truly I will praise God for all the days of my life, and that through me and my fellow brothers and sisters, His love endures forever.


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