Keeping Count

"If you want Prince Charming, you better be Cinderella."
Isn't that interesting. All the time we're looking for this perfect person but if we met him/her, would we be the perfect person for them? We place these high expectations on people yet when it comes to ourselves we're allowed a little extra grace for our shortfalls. Most often people have a double standard; a good relationship to them is one that benefits them and not the other way around. When the other party contributes well they are more happy, and they themselves do not want to be the ones that give more. That's understandable, not wanting to be the person that is giving and not receiving. However, the problem arises not in who's giving or receiving, but the fact that you're keeping count.

Keeping count means you're already favouring yourself, and that's not what friendship is. Friendship is mutual, what you'd expect from others, and what others expect from you. The only person you should be counting and judging is yourself, making sure you're a friend. If you are truly friends with someone you would help them even if the see-saw is sitting on your end.

The same goes for relationships. Too often I see girls expecting men to wow them and endlessly try to make the happy, and yes that should be the case, provided that the girl too is trying to make the man happy. They're called a couple, not a single and her partner or vice versa. Of course, there are relationships where the man neglects the woman, and it is obvious that that partnership is a faltering one, or it has already failed.

We often expect all this from others, wanting this perfect partner, perfect friendships, perfect families. We cannot force other people to love us, but we make our decision to love them. As we know, we like those who love us, no surprise there. Love people anyway, and I think, they'll grow fond of you too.